The Library Ballad-Jackie’s Discovery

Tis a tale of wonder and joy that’s to follow
Though’t may be hard for some readers t’ swallow
Tis about a boy who made a wondrous discovery.
He had a name a bit musical flowery, clovery

Just a bit o’ the Boy b‘fore we begin.
He w’s a good lad with much varied kin.
His names were attached at beginning and end.
Where his folks chose to place them, was just up to them.

Well what w’s his name?
Twas a bright sight to see.
He callt himself simply
Jackie McDoole Chin Miller Nagasaki Smith Gonzalez Gelecovski

Now this w’s a boy not so diffrent as you
Who ‘ad imagination tis true
He wondrd ‘of most of the things all ‘bout
So studeyed them throo and throo

His travels were Jackie-long but short & small of step
For his gait was only a two foot or so though his walk be full of vigor and pep.
He wandrd local hills and studeyed the trunks of trees
He studeyed dogs and cats, (and therefore studeyed fleas)

He road his byke to the mall and studeyed people at the store
And He went down to the park and watcht the people more.
One evening Jackie gazd intently up at the stars.
He Couldn’t find Jupiter, and ne’er found Mars
He didn’t ‘ave a book at home So his eyes just roamd,
his eyes just roamd. Ne’er finding Mars.

At last He could walk no further, bike no faster-He’d seen all that he could see.
He return’t to the same old trees and dogs and cats, (and therefore revisit’d fleas)
All the people he’d already seen, and those stars seem’d very remote.
He’d seen his small world, through and through. So…he

became bored.
and more than sad.
so he lowert his head,
walkt to his home
turnt on the tv,
not removing his coat.

And watcht…
and watcht…
and watcht…
and watcht…
and watcht
and fell asleep.

A terrible dream! A terrible dream!
Jackie woke up with an ‘orrible scream.
He’d been huntd and chasd by the Fear of Unknown
A large gurgly Maw with teeth overgrown

It chased him and chided and teased his small brain,
and caused anguish and pain again and again!
Embarrass’t, and sham’d of his lazy existence,
His face scrunch’t up with twisted persistence.

Jackie crawld into his hole in retreat.
He crawlt in his hole In first were his feet
“HOW DO I GET OUT?”
He yelt with a shout.
He startd to pout.
And Jackie awoke.
The tv was blaring it-sounded too loud.

The sofa was sunk’n and the pillows were flat.
No thickr than a thin exercise mat.
So he layd them about in such an array,
And exercised for his very first day.

His intentions were good, but his knowledge was poor,
And b’fore too long he was nothing but sore.
Where could he learn how to exercise right
So he wouldn’t ‘ave pains all through the night?
Where could he go t’gain some insight?


He askt his teacher, his parents and even his friends.
“Do you ‘ave secret knowledge toward my ends?”
“The Library may ‘ave what you seek”
said his teacher Mrs. Galloweek.

She gave him instruction on how to get there.
He was elated, it was actually near.
Not two hundrd steps from his favorite park.
Why ‘adn’t he seen it when he was studying bark?

But this boy of ours he wasn’t so brave
That building it lookt like a dark deep cave
Full of danger and also the creepy unknown
Would he ever come out if he went in there alone?

He approacht the place slowly and meekly and scared
The sliding door opent and greatr he feard
It hisst like a snake that just came awake
He started to shake, it’s all he could take!

Up the ramp to his doom he said to himself
But then he walkt in and saw the first shelf.
And then more beyond, beyond a clear door,
He saw large heavy structures from ceiling t’ floor.

There were books upon books, and stacks upon stacks.
All fillt with stories, and riddles and facts.
Opinions and polls, and fairies and elves.
All orderd neatly on hundrds of shelves.

The lights o’erhead and the carpet b’low
And tables and desks row after row
This Fillt Jackie’s head with ‘more- than- enough’
His mind went numb, this would be tough!

How could he find an exercise book?
He’d spend five hours with hardly a look
At the books and the knowledge they all contain’d
It was chaos and mystical legerdemain.

He yelpt. And gaspt. And screamt at last.
He fell to his knees this was too much.
He tried to stand but needed a crutch.
His head it was light


And his legs they were wobbling
As he read a near title “The Art of Great Cobbling”
What was this cobbling? Why did he care,
He wanted an exercise book right then and there!

A worker came over to help him sit down.
She whisperd “We need to be quiet here, Why the sad frown?”
“I ‘ad a dream of exercise
but THIS is a curse, not a big prize

I’ll spend more time than I ‘ave each day
Just looking for how to stretch the right way”
She gigglt and smilt so he wouldn’t get madder
“Perhaps I can help you so you don’t become sadder”

“Our books are arrang’d by number and letter
Once you know the code, you’ll find them much better.”

If your interest is in the mind and how we think and act
Go to the ones to get some views and facts.
If you wish to learn about religious points of view
Visit the twos and that should surely do.
Now if general education is what you want to learn about
Walk to the threes you’ll learn without a doubt
To speak another language or simply learn some other words
Travel to the fours and find some words you ‘aven’t heard.
For the Natural Sciences you may hold dear
Skip to the fives they’re really quite near
And for hobbies and gadgets and gizmos and pets
Go to the sixes, you’ll ‘ave no regrets.
The sevens are best when you wish to see art
And music and photographs that’ll wrench at your heart
To grab a great book written long, long ago,
Visit the eights and watch your mind grow.
To find out about Yemen or Japan or Peru
Jump to the nines and they’ll surely serve you.

Or search on the computer if you know the title
or author or subject but ‘tis simply not vital.
If all you wish is to read and peruse
The Library is yours. ‘tis yours to use.

Jackie with wide eyes and new found direction
With a very soft voice and quiv’ring inflection
Askt for her help in finding Mars
and Jupiter And not a few stars

And then he found books on exercise
(But he passt on the one “Shrinking Your Thighs”)
And on his way out, his legs still a’wobbling.
He pick’t up that book “The Art of Great Cobbling”

“Just return them to me or the return cart with care
So when the next patron wants them, they’ll be ready and there.”
You’ll need a library card to allow you to borrow
‘tis quite simple so get it today not tomorrow.

She askt him his name to provide his new card
“Fill out the paper, ‘tis not very hard”
When he hemmd and he hawd and delayd not a little
With consternation on his brow and his lip full of spittle

And sweat running profusely down poor Jackie’s head
And his cheeks turning every shade of pink and bright red
The clerk lookt at him softly and askt “Can I help?”
He sadly cried with his quiet soft yelp

“My name doesn’t fit! I can’t get a book!
I’ll ‘ave to return all these books that I took!
“You’ll do no such thing, Let’s just ‘ave a see.
What is your full name?”
“Jackie McDoole Chin Miller Nagasaki Smith Gonzalez Gelecovski”

Her jaw dropt a little, her eyes became wide
But she was determin’d to help this boy at her side.
She said “We may ‘ave to adjust it a bit, ‘tis just for our computer
It won’t hurt you one bit.

She finaglt and fought with each stubborn letter
In hopes of making a nice name that fit better
On a library card that ‘ad limited space
A shorter name that would still be held in high place

And finally she did it
She did it you’ll see
She adjusted the card to
“J. McChilnasmilezski”

So Jackie discover’d either his name was too long
Or the library computer was just way too small.
So he started a fund for a bigger computer
It wasn’t his name that was wrong after all.

Copyright 2008 John Reed Clark July 17th, 2008